Frequently Asked Questions
I’m lost and I don’t know what to do
We hear you. Separation sometimes takes people by surprise and can leave you feeling lost, betrayed, sad, angry and frustrated. Add to that the fact that you may be a parent supporting children through this new world order, know that it is completely normal to have feelings of being a little lost.
Feel free to book in a free 20 minute confidential and obligation free chat to Ruth about where to from here.
Mediation and Family Dispute Resolution
What is the difference between a mediator and a Family Dispute Resolution Practitioner?
The only difference between a mediator and an FDRP is that only an FDRP is accredited to issue a section 60I certificate by the Attorney-General's Department (Cth).
Why do I need mediation or family dispute resolution?
The new Family Court processes make it abundantly clear that the Court expects separating parties to resolve their parenting and property issues by dispute resolution, and only go to Court if necessary. Any matters which include risk and safety concerns for any party are excluded from this expectation. Before you file proceedings, the Court wants to see that you have made a genuine attempt to resolve or narrow the issues. Mediation or family dispute resolution (‘FDR’) is an excellent way to achieve this. You can never know what a judge might decide on the day of your hearing and mediation allows you to have greater control and certainty over the arrangements.
FDR is a confidential discussion between the parties guided by the mediator or Family Dispute Resolution Practitioner (‘FDRP’). The FDRP cannot give legal advice or tell you what to do. The FDRP’s role is to help you have a discussion – and it is sometimes a very stressful, awkward and uncomfortable discussion, in a safe space and in a non-judgemental, fair and balanced manner. The FDRP will give everyone an opportunity to speak and to be heard, and help you find some options that are in the best interests of the child or children moving forward.
FDR may not always be appropriate at a particular point in time. This is particularly so where there are risk and safety concerns for any party, or any children involved.
The FDRP can help you prepare a parenting plan or property settlement. The FDRP can also help you think carefully about not just where the conflict sits, but how to find the pieces of the puzzle that may lead to resolution and the start of a more peaceful coparenting relationship. This will ultimately benefit not only you, but your children. A happy parent is a better parent, and the sooner disputes can be resolved the faster harmony can evolve.
What is a section 60I certificate?
Where a family dispute involves children, the Court needs to see confirmation that the family members have tried to resolve the issues at mediation before they can go to Court. This confirmation is by way of the section 60I certificate under the Family Law Act 1975 (Cth).
There are 5 different types of section 60I certificates;
- One party tried to attend mediation but the other party refused to engage;
- The mediator determined that it was not appropriate to proceed with mediation at that point in time;
- All parties attended for mediation and made a genuine effort to resolve the issues;
- All parties attended for mediation, but one or more of the parties did not make a genuine effort; and
- All parties attended for mediation, but, at some stage, the mediator determined that it was not appropriate to continue with the mediation at that point in time.
For further information, please contact us.
What is a certificate of dispute resolution?
Within 5 months of filing court proceedings, the Court may require you to participate in family dispute resolution (‘FDR’). After you have attended FDR the mediator or FDRP must give the parties and file with the Court a certificate of dispute resolution to confirm the following:
- whether the matter was able to be resolved, partially resolved or not resolved at all
- whether all parties attended or did not attend
- whether all parties made a genuine effort
What is the difference between a section of 60I certificate and a certificate of dispute resolution?
A section 60(I) certificate is required before you can file court proceedings in a parenting matter. The certificate of dispute resolution relates to mediation that takes place after court proceedings have commenced and relates to both parenting and property/financial matters.
What is my duty of disclosure?
Disclosure is a matter of show and tell, not hide and seek. The Court takes a very dim view of any party that tries to hide assets or doesn’t provide full disclosure. So what does this mean for you?
The Court requires you to prepare a statement of assets and liabilities including superannuation as at the time of separation, and to then work out the current value of both. You must then exchange the details. You don’t have to agree with the other party’s assessment, but if you feel that some things are missing you can raise it ahead of the mediation with the other party. In the meantime, make sure that you have included everything on your list and have given it to the other party well ahead of the mediation date.
We will discuss the importance of disclosure at intake and give you the information about your obligations.
What happens at intake?
Intake is an opportunity for you and Ruth to have a confidential chat one on one about what’s happened in the past, where you are at the moment, and what you are hoping to achieve moving forwards. It’s also a chance for you to discuss any risk and safety concerns that you may have. We can work with you to outline a safety plan and make referrals for you to support services if necessary. In the event there are serious risk and safety concerns, it may not be appropriate to proceed to mediation at that point in time and a section 60(I)(b) will be issued to you.
I'm a grandparent - what are my rights to see my grandchildren once their parents separate?
The Court believes that children have a right to spend time with parents, grandparents and any other people who are important in their lives. The Court recognises that grandparents may play a significant role in the lives of their grandchildren but will always make a decision based on what is in the best interests of the child.
If you find yourself suddenly shut out from your grandchild’s life, you have the right to bring an application to the Court. However, you will need a section 60I certificate before you can bring the application. If you find yourself in this position, please contact us and we can talk you through the options.
Are agreements reached at mediation legally binding?
No. Any agreements reached at mediation are good faith agreements. You will leave with a summary of the agreements or heads of agreement. You can then turn it into a parenting plan simply be having both parties sign and date it. For further information, please contact us.
How do I prepare for mediation?
We will walk you through the mediation process and preparation at intake. In the meantime, you might want to consider the following:
- What are the main issues in dispute for you?
- What do you think the other party’s main issues will be?
- What is important to you?
- What would you like life to look like in 2 years time?
- Be open minded and open to other options
- Prepare a few options that would work for you and are in the best interests of the children
- No one ever gets 100% - not even at court, so be prepared to consider alternatives that will still work for you and be in the best interests of the children
- Make full disclosure ahead of time – if you ambush the other party mediation may have to be rescheduled and the fees may not be refundable (see cancellation policy)
- Avoid blaming and shaming – mediation is future focussed and dwelling on past hurts may not be helpful for lots of reasons
Where are your mediation services located?
We offer in person, telephone or online/Teams mediation services Australia wide. We use the facilities offered at serviced offices and the cost is included in the fixed fee regardless of location. Our fixed fee mediation fees are inclusive of GST, intake, reading time, heads of agreement, venue hire, section 60I certificate, certificate of dispute resolution, and our travel time, transfers and accommodation costs, if any. The only things that aren’t included are airfares, your own meals and snacks and the cost of your own lawyer.
Parenting Coordination
What is parenting coordination?
Congratulations! You’ve reached the end of the divorce process, and you’ve got your property settlement and parenting orders sorted. You’ve paid your final legal bills, and you’re ready to move forwards as coparents. For most parents, this is something they can manage.
However, some parents have never been shown how to communicate as a coparent, and the issues and tensions that you experienced during the separation and divorce process continue long after you’ve said goodbye to the Family Court.
It is often the little day to day things that cause the greatest frustration between coparents, such as time and place of changeovers, extra-curricular activities, and swapping time. Your parenting coordinator can help you navigate these disagreements and reduce the possibility of your children being caught up in any conflict.
Exposing children to ongoing conflict, even if covert, can cause lifelong harm for children socially, emotionally, academically, and sometimes physically. Parenting coordination will help both parents move forward with the implementation of their orders in a manner that will benefit both the children and you as coparents. It coaches both parents in appropriate language and communication strategies and will help you both manage tension and frustration moving forwards. It includes the option of email monitoring from time to time until both parents become familiar with the new strategies.
For further information, please contact us.
What if my ex won't agree to Parenting Coordination?
Your ex won’t agree to Parenting Coordination? Unfortunately, without a Court Order we can’t make anyone participate in parenting coordination. However, we encourage you to engage in our conflict management 101 program. Please contact us to explore the options.
Collaborative Practice
What is Collaborative Practice?
Collaborative Practice is a process that helps you find solutions without going to Court. Through a series of family focussed meetings, your collaborative team will support all parties resolve disputes by problem solving together as a team, regardless of whether the issues are physical, social, emotional, financial or legal.
All team members contribute to generating, exploring and reality testing options in a calm and supportive space where there is no wrong idea or answer. Your initial collaborative team will consist of you, your lawyer, your ex, their lawyer, and your collaborative coach. From there, other practitioners can join you at the table to contribute to the conversation and the options, and everyone works through the issues together. Other team members may include valuers, forensic accountants, financial planners, your own accountants, divorce coaches, child consultants, and medical specialists to name a few.
Collaborative practice is ideal for resolving disputes concerning family matters and contested wills and estate matters.
Why do I need a Collaborative Coach?
The role of the coach is unique as although the coach can contribute to the conversation and option generation, the coach is neutral in the process. Separation and settlement negotiation can be tricky. So too negotiating with grieving relatives where a loved one's estate has been contested. Emotions are triggered, tempers may simmer, and everyone can get frustrated at times, including the lawyers. The coach is the keeper of the peace, the guardian of the process and the protecter of respectful conversations. The coach will also help the collaborative team remain focussed on the goals that you agreed you wanted to achieve at the outset, and the dream that you envisaged for your new future.
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